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One of my favorite Instagram accounts is Satiregram. Whoever is behind it does a great job simply describing cliche photos that often appear. For example, around Thanksgiving, he/she will write on a plain piece of brown paper: “Photo of a turkey.” It brings a chuckle because whoever it is points out (albeit anonymously) the types of things that many of us get peeved at when it comes to social media.
I’ve been tempted to start an anonymous account where I could put comments I feel like saying sometimes, but don’t because I try to be a nice, relatively agreeable person. However for fun (because “laugh” is one of HOPE’s core values) here are some comments I think some folks would like to make on social media sometimes, but tend to refrain from writing. This reveals the very human side of us, but I figured it’s not a bad idea to be honest with ourselves.
Disclaimer: I have lots of connections on social media and thus have seen it used in many ways over the years. The following comments in no way imply that the people on social media aren’t wonderful, worthwhile to know people. As a matter of fact, I’m guilty of posting things that would prompt some of these comments myself! So let’s all enjoy this in the SPIRIT OF FUN, and if you feel pricked that maybe you should adjust some of what you share, then fine. I’m also not implying that if you actually do respond like this occasionally, that you aren’t a nice person overall. I have no intention of starting a debate or have bad feelings with any of you! And you can feel free to disagree in the comments.
Most of these could use the invisible “sarcasm font”:
Yes, you have (delightful, gorgeous, smart, etc) children. So do 1 million other parents.
Wow…your child did (a typical thing many children do)…I’ve never seen that before!
You’re going on another cruise/trip to Disney World/visit to the beach house. How nice.
Are you sure that story is true? (for the news items that aren’t really accurate news items)
Did you realize this came from a satire site?
You spent 30 seconds with a famous person. Aren’t you special?! (Guilty!)
You eat dinner with your friends…how unique!
That saying sounds good, but is it really? (for all the “meaningful” quotes that go around, some of which aren’t actually very wise or biblical.)
Yes. You look good. You’re gorgeous. Always. Every day. Okay?
Shall I call the waaah-bu-lance for you?
Get over it/yourself, (whichever applies.)
Oh, you have something to sell? No kidding. I wouldn’t have known.
No, not everybody “knows/believes/would do/wouldn’t do” that.
Not everyone thinks pets are worthy of worship.
Oh, you’re out of the country and your home is empty? Or you are on your trip and your wife and kids are home alone? Good idea to share that.
Do the parents of those children know you are sharing photos of their kids?
That picture of (feet/heart hands/insert other cliche shot here) is the most unique shot I’ve ever seen. Very creative.
Your kid disappointed you? I’m sure knowing you shared this on social media will strengthen your relationship with him/her.
That food looks delicious, but does that cooperate with your stated fitness goals?
So do you really mean that in all of your life, this was the best. day. ever?
I bet the owner of that car appreciates that you’ve shared their license plate number publicly.
Sometimes, it’s not the status updates or photos themselves you want to comment on, it’s the comments from others that cause you to roll your eyes. Here are a few more examples, all based on comments I have seen people make.
No, you don’t really wish to “have their life.” They have problems too.
No, she is not perfect (or, no, that _______ is not “perfection.”)
Yes, her kids are cute/precious/smart but this not an uncommon thing with kids. Stop making it sound like it’s so unusual.
No, they are not the best family/parents you have ever seen. They are good. But they are human.
If you “wish you could be her/him/them” go make some changes to your own life!
Anything tagged: “That _____ though!”
Are you laughing yet? Are you saying (like me, for some of these) GUILTY!?
On a serious note, many of these posts and comments, including the original ones and the responses, display a spirit of discontentment (yes, even the satirical responses.) Social media is a great environment for many things, but can also be a dangerous one for developing attitudes of anger and dissatisfaction. If you’ve shared posts like the above (I have) or wished to make comments like the above (I have) use it as an opportunity to examine your own heart and ask yourself some questions.
Question: are there social media comments and statuses that drive you crazy? Share in the comments/via reply email/on social media (just be reasonably nice!)
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